there's more to life than this

I was hoping I would have something...vaguely interesting to share, but I am now at that tired stage where I do little 5 minute power naps and am constantly on the brink of losing consciousness/residing in dreamland. It is unfortunately not possible to share my waking dreams, they defy coherent thought or articulation.

Outside the world is on fire, and friends of mine have either had to evacuate or are on alert to evacuate their homes. Last night on my way home from the Smell I not only got the amazing night view of the fire but witnessed a separate car fire on the freeway. The car was parked up alongside yet another dry hill and I feared that another roaring blaze would start.

I am still struggling with this diary, alternately hating (but in a nice way) it and finding it a much-needed outlet. It is as it always has been -- writing has always been a joy and a burden, and much of my writing is either censored or pounded into oblivion by the inner critic my high school journalism teacher encouraged me to silence ("at least for the first draft!").

I wanna go swimming.